A number of halachic rulings have been written as to whether Jewish law allows for the celebration of non-Jewish holidays such as Valentine’s Day. Rabbi Mike Uram, Chief Jewish Learning Officer for Jewish Federations of North America and previously with Pardes North America among other posts, offered his viewpoint in a recent article, “Valentine’s Day and Judaism.”

He referred to Rama (Rabbi Moshe Isserles, Poland, 1520-1572), who explains that there are four criteria that must be met in order to permit Jewish celebration of rituals initiated by non-Jews (Rama Y.D. 178:1 as interpreted by Rabbi Michael Broyde).

1. Does the debated activity have a secular origin or value?
2. Can one rationally explain the behavior or ritual apart from the gentile holiday or event?
3. If there are idolatrous origins, have they disappeared?
4. Are the activities actually consistent with Jewish tradition?

In the case of Valentine’s Day, Uram posits, one may argue that the rituals performed today do meet these criteria. Sending cards and chocolates and giving gifts can be explained as rational expressions of love and appreciation independent of possible Christian or Pagan roots. In addition, these roots have been questioned by scholars and the Catholic church.

Finally he notes, the desire to express love and to offer gifts as a symbol of those feeling is certainly in line with Jewish tradition and values. The idea of a special day set aside to encourage coupledom is also well rooted in the Jewish tradition: Tu B’Av, the 15th day of the Jewish month of Av, was an ancient day of matchmaking that has experienced something of a revival in modern times.

While it does not represent every opinion in Jewish literature, the source from the Rama does provide a salient basis on which many rabbis allow Jewish participation in modern-day Valentine’s Day rituals.

We at Jewish Federation in the Heart of NJ are cognizant of differing viewpoints that reflect various Jewish texts, traditions, and thought. Fundamentally, we can appreciate any reminder to express affection, appreciation, devotion, friendship, passion, respect, love, and support for whom and what we care about.